From this privileged platform, I express my surprise and concern after watching a program on a channel that deals with spiritual matters. The topic was spiritual direction and abuse of conscience, and at times it was presented rather casually. Based on what I heard, and always with all due respect, I would like to offer a few thoughts, as there are points on which I disagree, guided by my own experience.

First of all, no one possesses absolute truth. And I think it’s important to start from this point because we can all make mistakes: priests, religious, and laity. To claim that spiritual direction is exclusive to the priesthood, as was stated in that forum, is inaccurate. By virtue of having been baptized, a prepared person can perfectly well assume the spiritual direction of another, as happens in ecclesial groups composed of men or women. But lay people can also do so because it is a charism that flows from the sacrament that makes us children of God and through which we receive sanctifying grace.

Clarity, discernment, and sound judgment are not privileges of the priesthood. There are good and bad confessors, just as there are virtuous people and those who are not. The lives of saints offer examples of all of this. Saint John Vianney and Padre Pio embody those holy priests who listened with deep emotion, without regard for time, to the many weaknesses that dwell in the hearts of penitents. Many priests have gone out (and continue to go out) to meet them, encouraging them to approach the confessional; they pray for their own conversion and that of others. Conversely, other priests have been a scourge to those who placed their trust in their authority, convinced that their word came from God. For instance, Saint Teresa of Ávila and Saint Jane Frances de Chantal, whom Saint Francis de Sales rescued from a world riddled with scruples that her previous spiritual director had failed to guide.

Prudence and charity, knowing how to balance rigor—always respectful of the other’s dignity—and mercy, are not the sole domain of the priesthood. One must be a person of prayer, tested in virtue—which does not mean that temptations and weaknesses are absent—in order to mature in faith and experience trembling before the great responsibility of guiding others. Humility is required, allowing oneself to be guided by the conviction that it is the Holy Spirit who blows where He wills, who directs, who bestows upon the spiritual director whatever gifts are needed. A blind man cannot lead another blind man, as the Gospel says, and we all have our blind spots.

Any channel that addresses such sensitive topics should bear in mind that a spiritually vulnerable person can be negatively affected by certain remarks, such as those made in the program that prompted this reflection. For example, mentioning the frequency of spiritual direction, even if it was stated that everyone should seek help whenever they wish and have a specific problem they need to discuss. The fact that it was literally said that once a week “is boring”—even if it was meant jokingly—can lead to doubts about the value of this practice in those who already engage in it, or discourage those who might consider it. It can leave the impression that we are acting inappropriately or causing a nuisance by seeking advice regularly. Each person has their own needs and timing, which should have been emphasized in that program, as well as the availability to respond to them. It is not simply a service. You are either an apostle or you are not.

I insist. I modestly believe that these are risks that must be considered before making certain statements because we don’t know who is watching or listening, just as we don’t know who is reading. Furthermore, we forget that we must reconcile ourselves with God and with our neighbor daily. The sacrament of reconciliation is a grace. And, within its limitations (since only a priest can hear confessions), so too is the spiritual direction that a religious, even if not ordained, or a well-formed layperson can provide. The fruits are immense because receiving light in the darkness that, for one reason or another, plagues the mind and heart is a blessing for our lives that extends to our relationships with others. Therefore, weekly spiritual direction is not “boring” on a spiritual journey. For many, it is necessary, although I would call it  essential.

While glossing over a far from trivial matter related to the issue of abuse of conscience, there was also mention of the obedience owed to a superior (presumably a priest or religious) based on the belief that God speaks through their words. This was dismissed as a relic of the past, with a focus on the potential dangers: relinquishing one’s own responsibility to that person or allowing one’s conscience to be taken over, which has sometimes led, among other serious problems, to sexual abuse. These statements require clarification. It is true that abuses of conscience have caused immense harm in the Church, and sexual abuse is one of them. However, it was not mentioned that these abuses stemmed from individuals who made their impenitence an abject reign, imposing their vices on the weak, and this should have been pointed out. Beyond that, authentic obedience is not a thing of the past. For many, it remains a liberating virtue, chosen out of love for God, without implying a loss of autonomy in the decisions that must be made. One simply offers oneself up, making a profession before Christ of living that virtue alongside chastity and poverty, when applicable. Therefore, every religious, for example, discerns God’s will for their life in the needs related to the mission set by their superior. If one were to choose for oneself, one might be tempted to seek the bare minimum. And when we speak in evangelical terms, we are invited to be saints; not merely  good people , of which there are fortunately many, but to be heroic in virtue. And it is evangelical to teach the highest, not the lowest. Padre Pio understood this clearly: “Where there is no obedience, there is no virtue, no goodness, no love. And where there is no love, there is no God. Without God, we cannot reach heaven. These virtues form a ladder; if one step is missing, we fall.”

I conclude by reminding everyone that if the expressions are not rigorous and give the impression of making statements that have the character of law, one may be influencing the conscience of others, obtaining precisely the opposite result to the one intended.