There is a phrase from Saint Augustine that should be the anchor of every father and mother in moments of greatest uncertainty:  “When you cannot talk to someone about God, talk to God about him . “

During the early years of raising children, raising them in the faith is often a sweet and shared journey. Going to Mass as a family was almost a festive ritual: the Eucharist, the meal together, and the innocent excitement of the children waiting for their reward upon leaving—the colorful balloon, the cotton candy, or the ice cream. Faith was experienced naturally, in an everyday, and joyful way. We always had God on the tip of our tongues for everything:  “God willing ,  ” “God willing ,  ” “Let’s pray about it . “

However, time marches on and the dynamics change.

The wall of youth and the “Fairy Godmother”

Adolescence arrives, bringing with it screens, video game consoles, and a fascination with the world. The allure of ice cream or a balloon loses its appeal. Later, as young adults enter adulthood, an even more subtle illusion emerges: self-sufficiency. When a young person is doing well, feeling healthy, intelligent, and in control of their life, it’s easy for them to begin thinking that God is dispensable.

That’s when deep questions arise, and even resentment:

• “Why did God allow my family member to die?”
• “Why are there wars and injustices if God is love?”
• “Why do others get what they want, but he doesn’t listen to me?”

Deep down, we tend to get frustrated because we invent a God to suit our needs: not a true God, but a  magician or a fairy godmother  to whom we can ask for three spectacular wishes to fix our lives effortlessly.

We forget that earthly life is a struggle, a constant teaching and learning process. Jesus didn’t end up on a cross to guarantee us a life without pain, but to teach us the way. The world of perfect happiness and “three wishes granted” exists, but it’s called  eternity .

God has a thousand paths that you cannot reach

So what do you do when your words bounce off the hearts of your children or the people you love most? What do you do when every attempt to talk about faith ends with,  “Here we go again” ?

It’s time to change your strategy. If you can’t talk to them about God,  start talking to God about them .

We must humbly acknowledge our own limitations as parents or friends:

“Lord, where I cannot reach, you reach. My words already bounce off, my testimony is not enough. But you have means that I would never think of.”

Sometimes, God’s love isn’t shown by granting everything, but by allowing deprivations that teach us to value what’s essential. Just as a parent doesn’t punish their child by taking away their phone for not studying, but rather teaches them the reality of things, God allows us to experience limitations so we remember that we don’t give ourselves life, health, or even a single second. God has a thousand ways to touch a heart.