In the seventh chapter, we delve into the understanding of love as a joint expression of soul and body. We are not just body nor just soul; we are a substantial unity where both aspects go hand in hand. The body becomes the medium through which the soul manifests and concretizes that love.
Types of Relationships: Instrumental and Personal
There are two basic types of relationships in the person: instrumental and personal. Instrumental relationships are those in which we interact with others to obtain something specific, such as shopping at the market, commissioning a project or visiting the doctor. These relationships do not involve the whole person, but only a part of it, since they are partial.
On the other hand, personal relationships are those where we recognize the absolute dignity of the other. In these relationships, we move away from using the other and a different, deeper and more complete connection arises. It is in this context that love is defined as a personal relationship, based on the reciprocal recognition of the absolute dignity of the other.
Eros and Agape: The Components of Love
Pope Benedict XVI, in his first encyclical on love, clarified that this concept has two essential components: Eros and agape. Eros is the ascending dimension of love, which makes us feel joy and a meaning to live. It is the kind of love that excites and elevates, much appreciated, especially by teenagers. However, if this Eros is sincere and not selfish, it must give space to the descending dimension of love, which is agape. Agape implies service, sacrifice and giving oneself to the other to make him happy. Both elements, Eros and agape, must be present for love to be complete and true.
The Four Fundamental Types of Love
Following C.S. In his book “The Four Loves,” Lewis distinguishes four fundamental types of love:
- Sympathy: This is the most basic and superficial love, based on affinity and common tastes with other people.
- Friendship: This arises when, in addition to sympathy, there is mutual understanding and treatment, respect and trust. Friendship is a deep and lasting love, with its own content, distinct from marital love.
- Falling in Love and Dating: This love is specific and focused on a single person. Unlike friendship, it is exclusive and open to a common life project.
- Charity: This is the self-love of Christ, a love substantially different and much deeper than philanthropy. Charity implies a total and selfless dedication, possible only through communion with Christ.
The Body as a Means of Communicating Love
The body plays a crucial role in the manifestation of love. A caress, for example, is much more than a simple physical gesture; it is a corporeal way of transmitting love. This love can be of charity, as when we caress a leper, of Eros and agape in marriage, or between friends when one needs comfort.
In short, we are a substantial unity of soul and body, and we love through both. The criterion for knowing if we are truly loving lies in the presence of both Eros, which fills us with joy, and agape, which leads us to sacrifice and surrender. This integration is the key to living love in all its dimensions and depths.
