After watching the controversial and widely discussed series Adolescence, I’m left wondering: at what point did we lose our common sense when it comes to parenting? The series starkly portrays a reality we know well, even though we often don’t want to face it head-on: bullying is neither an anecdote nor an exception. It’s an evil that affects thousands of children and adolescents every day. It’s a silent drama that occurs in hallways, classrooms, playgrounds, and on social media. And, most alarmingly, we’re already normalizing it.

I remember the recent case of a boy who brought a cake to school to celebrate his birthday. Far from receiving a song or a smile, he was met with contempt. No one wanted to accompany him. It’s not just that child. There are many. And as you’re reading this, there’s probably another child being rejected, insulted, or isolated by their classmates.

But the most painful thing isn’t just the act of bullying, but the silence of those who witness it and don’t act. The culture of “don’t interfere” has taken hold among children, adolescents, adults, schools, and even entire families.

And then I think about us, the parents. What are we doing? Perhaps part of the problem stems from a kind of misunderstood affection. We come from a generation that grew up eating chopped meat while our parents kept the ham for themselves. Today, we’ve reversed roles, giving our children the ham and keeping the leftovers for ourselves—not in material terms, but rather in terms of authority, in the transmission of values, and in the exercise of demanding love.

In our quest to spare them suffering, we have created children incapable of accepting correction, of coping with frustration, or of recognizing authority. Instead of developing strong people, we are producing fragile, disoriented, and often cruel adolescents.

And when bullying occurs, what response do schools find? Often, an impeccable bureaucracy: forms, protocols, referrals… but little heart, little real commitment. It’s urgent that we change this cold institutional attitude to a humane and preventative one. Let’s not wait for the fire to spread. Let’s put out the first spark.

We also need a more active educational community. Trained, courageous teachers capable of intervening, and why not, volunteer student groups to protect the most vulnerable. Turn kindness into something desirable, something “cool.” Make defending the weak a popular cause, not a rarity.

And yes, we must also correct. Bullies must be taught that the world doesn’t revolve around them. Punishments that are formative, restorative, that teach them to look at others. Not to humiliate them, but to transform their hearts.

In the end, this struggle is not only pedagogical. It’s also spiritual. As a believer, I believe we cannot stop praying. For the victims, but also for the aggressors. They too are lost. They also struggle with wounds and emptiness. Asking the bullied child’s guardian angel to come to an agreement with the bully’s angel may seem naive, but I believe that in Heaven, battles for the dignity of our children are also fought.

After watching Adolescence, one thing is clear to me: we cannot remain silent. No more silence. No more looking the other way. It is urgent to educate them in compassion, respect, and firmness. And to remind them every day that being a good person is, yes, the coolest thing in the world.