In the realm of marriage and family, many wonders if it is possible to speak and give an opinion with authority without having personally experienced marriage. Over 30 years, I have listened to and helped numerous couples navigate their problems, not only in confession but also outside of it. My experience has allowed me to understand that, beyond teaching specific techniques on how to manage a relationship, the key lies in universal values such as forgiveness, service, affection, favors, understanding, and knowing how to give in.
During these years, I have dedicated approximately 60% of my time to listening to two or three couples a day, sometimes separately, which has given me a unique perspective on the challenges and solutions in marital relationships. It is essential to understand that the basis of any effective advice or support lies in the accumulated experience of listening and understanding.
The Therapy of Affection
One of the most interesting books I have ever read is “The Therapy of Affection” (La Terapia de le Cocole), written by a couples’ therapist. Although I read this book 20 years ago and do not remember the author, the essence of its message is still relevant: there is no better therapy than affection.
In the face of difficult situations such as depression, job loss, family conflicts or health problems, it is common to receive a variety of advice on activities that can help, such as reading, exercising, enjoying the outdoors, or finding a hobby. However, the real solution often lies in affection, in treating and loving our partner with love and dedication.
The Application of Affection
Affection therapy involves treating our partner with love in every aspect of daily life. This includes the way we address them, the tone of voice we use, the invitations we make, as well as the admiration and recognition of their achievements. Avoiding mentioning minor mistakes and focusing on the positive is crucial to maintaining a healthy and loving relationship.
Example of Jesus with his Apostles
A clear example of the therapy of affection is found in the relationship of Jesus with his apostles. After the resurrection, Jesus appeared to his disciples without reproach or humiliation, offering peace and affection instead of criticism. This 50-day period, from the resurrection to the ascension, was marked by an accompaniment full of love and understanding, preparing them for their future mission with renewed strength.
By applying the therapy of affection in our own homes, we must take advantage of every opportunity to show love and affection to our partner and family. With kind words, loving gestures and an understanding attitude, we can strengthen our relationships and overcome any challenge together. So, finishing this reflection, think about what you can do today to show affection to your loved ones. The decision is in your hands: you can choose reproach or affection. Let us always opt for love and mutual respect.
May God always bless you, dear friends. I am Father Ángel Espinosa de los Monteros. Thank you very much for reading this article. Subscribe for more content and follow me on all my social networks. Let’s do all the good we can, and may God bless you always.
Subscribe for more content and follow Father Ángel on all his social networks.
